Subcommandates Guide to the Gorilla Warfare
2006-04-09 18:02 GMT
It has been really busy week. As I already posted last week,
Felipe, the infamous subcommandante, came to visit me for a
week.
Saturday: Felipe arrives to Helsinki Vantaa airport, where he
is warmly greeted by the custom officials. Illegal substances
aren't found (there aren't any this time) during the throughout
investigation. Joe and Felipe start drinking.
At Joe's place Jay joins in. Team eats and starts getting
drunk. It is time to hit the night life of Helsinki. Two bars
and a student party later, team brokes up and Jay disappears.
Nobody has heard from him after Saturday.
Sunday: An easy day spent trying to cure hangovers. Joe cooks
some reindeer with mashed potatos. Finnish film "Paha Maa"
(Frozen Land) is rented and watched.
Monday: While Joe has to work, Felipe enjoys wandering around
Helsinki central in good spring weather. It rains both snow and
water.
As Joe finishes his day, boys meet up in Sports Academy, where
few girls try to make passes on our heroes getting very drunk
with Minttu -shots (40%) and vast amounts of beer. Mike
Eastback turns up along with A-K. Together we head to "The Rock
Bar", where we consume couple of� SuicideSurfers (named after
me and Jay).
From Rock Bar, which is quite empty, team heads up to
Lost&Found, which calls itself as heterofriendly gaybar.
Felipe scores a point with a very, very fat blond girl. No
extrapoints are gained since he fails to record anything to his
camera and doesn't perform "jekkubomba".
Tuesday: In the morning Felipe finds his way back home feeling
apparently great. He had just started chewing off his own hand,
when the whale had turned in sleep, so Felipe stays without
injuries.
Since Mike also wakes from Joe's place, team decides to get a
fish and enjoy a good dinner. On the way to the fishmarket boys
find some schnaps and end up on the ferry to Suomenlinna
(fortified island front of Helsinki).
A good fish is also bought and eaten afterwards.
Wednesday: Joe has work, so Felipe heads to Porvoo with A-K.
Day goes by without any great adventures.
Thursday: Felipe spends a day in the national museum. When Joe
gets back home an ad hoc decision is made. Joe, Felipe and A-K
head to the proletarian paradise Kallio and visit the legendary
restaurants of Tenkka and Roskapankki.
Felipe learns to say "I am an ukrainian porn star" in finnish
and enjoys the karaoke performers. Local color makes great
impression.
Friday: Felipe spends a day in Museum of Modern Art (Kiasma),
while Joe works. As soon as Joe is back home drinking starts.
Dinner is consumed in Zetor, the famous tractor restaurant in
Helsinki, specialiced in finnish food. First Minttu -shots of
the day get consumed.
From Zetor team goes to one of the most expensive bars in
Helsinki, Ateljee Bar in top floor of Hotel Torni. Felipe
consumes some whiskey and a beautiful cigar. From there the
only logical place to go is Corner, heavy metal bar. There
Felipe performs, after 5 shots, karaoke singing
"Iron Man". (125MB, but worth the wait!)
As drunkenness gets stronger and other performers worse, we
move out to a discotheque Onnela. There we party until late.
Felipe manages to buy some illegal substances from somalian
calling himself "Sugar".
Saturday: After buying souvenirs is time to go to Skolls ("The
Reindeer") place to have a sauna party. It turns out that Skoll
just got single again and Jose got thrown out for a month by
his girlfriend. Also Mark, Skolls junior brother is present.
After hard sauna and wrestling
with Mark, Joe passes out.
Sunday: Easy chilling. Movies "Once were warriors" and
"Lomalla" were rented.